Sunday, September 30, 2012

A New Set Of Challenges

So...I was in the hospital due to worsening balance and lack of strength issues. A very scary thing, given such a sudden onset.

I had a PT (Physical Therapy) consult and have been given a set of exercises to do daily.

And upon today's discharge, was given a walker for home use.

I am very lucky, however, because this is VERY TEMPORARY. And this is not the first time I've been sent home with a walker. When I was 18 I was sent home with a walker due to muscle atrophy.

As it turns out, this is much of the same thing this time around. When I was put on the new formula, the calorie concentration changed as well. And the rate did not. So I ended up losing a lot of weight in a very short amount of time. The lack of calories and the increased activity at the gym brought my blood pressure down to seriously low levels (dangerous levels as it turns out). And instead of of building muscle, I had been breaking it down further.

Hence, the need for the walker.

I am grateful for a device that helps me walk better. I can walk kinda slow, but straight and less risk of falling. And even more grateful that my prognosis is very good. Once my calorie levels are restored, and my legs are stronger, I can do the things that I was doing. That is why I am very, very lucky.

Still, it does hurt the pride a bit. My mom has already made a few comments that were somewhat hurtful. However, I know this is only because this is upsetting to her. I can only imagine what it must be like to watch your child struggle, however gracefully, and not being able to fix it.

Also, the apartment complex is kind of difficult to maneuver a walker, but it's already getting easier.

I'm going to work very hard, and get off this thing as soon as my body can handle it. But if my body needs more time, I will honor that too.

I believe whole heartedly that everything, the insurance issues, the odd symptoms, the frustration and strife, will all resolve at the right time. The last two venting posts, along with the hospitalization that put things into perspective, have really helped to encourage me and give me the emotional strength I need to survive these challenges, and thrive as I surpass them.

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